Thoughts from the road

A big thank you to everybody that’s been praying for my trip. Last night I made it safe to Nampula and the Orphanage! There was a very big celebration that took place. But more on that in the next post when I can actually collect myself. I’m still pretty short on sleep and I think my stomach is on a different time zone than my mind and both of them are on a different time zone than Mozambique. So until then, here are some random thoughts on my traveling the last 3 days.

When entering a country, make sure they stamp your passport. Do not assume that the “cah-chunk” noise means they stamped it properly. French officials do not want to hear about how it must have disappeared mysteriously and they should take your word that you actually visited their country.

I am convinced the best way to listen to Phoenix (the band) is sitting in the grass at the Eiffel Tower having a picnic and eating a baguette on a sunny day. I will never listen to Phoenix the same way again.

Pictured: Bliss

Sign of the times: Once you’ve paid to go up the Eiffel Tower, feel free to download their exclusive interactive self-guided tour for you iPad.

If you’re walking around Paris you need to fit one of three categories: a Frenchie, a tour group, or a have a girlfriend. If you’re having a picnic by yourself and don’t fit one of those categories people look at you very strangely and avoid going near you.

Its exactly 284 steps to the top of l’Arc de Triumphe. For those of you not good with numbers, 284 is a lot.

Pictured: Burming quads.

Tour groups of grandparents from America don’t mind you joining them. You’ll remind them of their grandkids. Unless you’re old or weird or scary. You still may remind them of their grandkids, but they won't want to be around you.

A popular scam in Paris seems to be finding some tourist that looks like they speak English, running ahead of them on the crosswalk, and bending down right in front of them and pretend to find a wedding ring in the crosswalk. They'll then ask you if its yours and if you lost it and then say they have no use for it and try to sell it to you. The third time this happened to me I bumped the guy right as he was bending down pretending to pick the ring up and he fell over and dropped the ring. I picked it up and asked him if he lost it and offered to sell it to him. He was not very happy.

It’s nice knowing the culture in Mozambique this time around. For example, when I paid for bottle of water in a Mozambique airport, the cashier took my money and walked away. The old TJ would have been outraged and chased him down. This time, I knew he was just going to the other vendors to try to make change. It took four minutes.

Its nice knowing the language in Mozambique as well. This way, you can tell when they announce that your plane will be several hours late because is hasn’t left its previous destination instead of wondering why you’re the only person sitting in the airport 10 minutes before you were supposed to take off.

As a final note, I just want to say that I don’t exactly proofread. Ever. So as a disclaimer I would like to say that my favorite misspelling ever would have to be the orphanage. So if you ever see any of the following: orphange, orhanage, and my personal favorite – Oprahnage – please know that I’m referring to the orphanage and not a secluded alpine monastery home to a cult that worships Oprah.