Inselbergs

We're here today to discuss probably the fourth biggest blessing God has given me since I've bee here, the landscape. What the heck is an inselberg? I'm glad you asked. Webster's defines it as INSELBERG (in-suhl-bherg) : n A freakin huge piece of rock that sticks out of the middle of nowhere.

These things are everywhere in Nampula (my city in Mozambique) and they're pretty hard to miss. The one below I saw going out to the Congo refugee camp one day. It's name escapes me, but it has a lot to do with the fact that it looks like a man's head: chin on the left, super cro-magnum-esque forhead on the right
As for the picture below, I know what you're thinking. "He's not in Australia, so why is that huge rock from Australia there? Did it teleport? Is it in a rotating display being showcased across the world? Did TJ find the island from LOST?" No, no, and I wish. This one can be seen from my bungalow and while it's hard to estimate, I put it at about 10 miles away. These things dot the landscape everywhere and are still breathtaking even after all this time.
I climbed a small version of one of these a while back to spend the afternoon/evening praying. You could see a lot of city from there. Theres another small one that's on the opposite side of town we drove up. That was a pretty fun experience too. Seriously, whenever I'm having a down day Jesus totally picks me up just by demonstrating all the beauty that surrounds us here in the orphanage.

Above is a picture showing three or four distinct rocks that are in reality miles apart. In the foreground is some of our neighbors. While I'd love to make it out there to go climbing one day, apparently there is too much danger from landmines on the roads out there so nobody goes there. And there's at least one kid who's here from parents having a run-in with landmines, so I'm not gonna take my chances (although if I did I wouldn't post it here because I know my mom is reading this).

So how does one get rid of an inselburg? I've outlined the procedure in three easy steps you can try at home.

1. Find men that live out in the bush and offer them a job.
2. Purchase for them a pick-axe. (If you are benevolent, you can also purchase coal or firewood*. This will allow them to stay warm at night when they sleep up on the rock while at the same time slightly warming/melting the rock to make the work easier.)
3. Use the pick-axe to destroy the rock.
   

That is literally how it's done. Good luck, and happy de-inselberging.


*Note: It is both impossible to acquire as well as unsafe to allow the bushmen to use thermite to melt the rock. This is not recommended and the author will not be held liable for the irresponsible use of bushmen.