'mericuh!

Now having been back at the orphanage for about a month, I have been pretty much silent on how my time went in America. In a word: AWESOME. It two months filled with family, baseball, friends, hikes, baseball, food, movies, baseball, and baseball. Yes, there was lot's of baseball.

The beginning of my time was marked by a week in Los Angeles. The pretext of the trip was celebrating my Grandparent's 50th wedding anniverary. In Nampula, a land where life expectancy does not reach fifty years, the kid's were rather incredulous when I told them about the event. “Really, I think you mean to say they're turning fifty? Oh, they've been married fifty years? To each other? The whole time?”

Only one of us was actually there, but thanks to the extra shirts all four of us get to relive the excitement.

It included a couple days at Disneyland, where I resisted the urge not to eat every turkey leg in sight. Being back in America and then two days later going to Disneyland was not as much culture shock as I expected after being in Nampula for two years. If I ever started feeling out of place I'd just go and do the jungle cruise and feel right at home (seriously).

The time in SoCal also included a trip to see an Angels baseball game and a jaunt to San Diego to take in the Padres. I also made a point of going to the Hollywood walk-of-fame to see my idol, John Wayne. And by see him, I mean stand above a slab of pavement with his name written on it.

 I went against the advice of my brother who said, "No finger guns." He's told me that on more than one occasion.

The rest of my time was spent mainly in Seattle visiting all sorts of family and friends that I haven't seen in forever. My brothers had also picked out a list of pretty much every movie to come out in the last two years that I needed to see. Basically, if it didn't have a superhero in it it wasn't worth watching. I also spent most evenings up late into the night mindlessly watching youtube to catch up on every thing was was supposedly popular or funny in the last two years. Not having fast enough internet to watch videos over here, I have basically come to the conclusion that people waste a lot of stinking time looking at videos of cats or Lady Gaga videos.

After youtube become not funny, the Olympics started and hoooooooooly cow is there some interesting stuff on at 2am in the morning. I lost I don't know how many nights of sleep staying away to watch fencing or whitewater kayaking or trampoline or weightlifting or archery or speedwalking or hammer throw or synchronized diving.

The kid's said they got to watch a little of the olympics on TV but just gave up after a while because they never had any idea what they were watching. Imagine having never seen a particular sport before. You could figure out the high jump pretty quick. Jump higher than the other guy. Same with the weightlifting or the rowing. But diving? The pommel horse? Individual synchronized swimming> (Yes, it's an event. Redundant, but still an event.)

Even I had difficulty watching the gymnastics and after seeing what I thought was a courageous effort doing flips and spins and stuff on the balance beam (there is a reason men do not do that event) hearing the announcer say, “Oh, and that was just disastrous, just heartbreaking,” and having absolutely no idea what went wrong.

Near the end of my time I had the chance to go with my folks to the Midwest. The object of the trip was literally to see baseball games. Most people find that funny, but that's because you don't know me or my family. The importance of baseball comes just after Jesus and squeezes in ahead of personal well-being (food, shelter, safety). Apart from seeing five baseball games we also took in the sights and sounds of Chicago, saw the dilapidation that is Detroit, the misery that it Cleveland sports, and—from what I'm told—toured a brewery in Milwaukee (details get a little hazy there there-on-out).

We made a stop in Wrigley Field to see the Cubs play. It was awesome. My dad also got his hands on a foul ball. Statistically, as many games as he's attendend he should have at least caught 5 foul ball by now. However, dad, you will never catch a foul ball always sitting in the cheap seats.

I will spare my brother the embarrassment of telling  how he could have had a souvenir too if not for hands being made of brick. (Or did I spare him...)

All in all, it was a fantastic time, I enjoyed every minute of, but as anybody can tell you that saw me the last several weeks I was there, I was itching to get back to my kids in Nampula. And now that I'm here, I'm missing my friends and cheeseburgers and milk, things that are just to expensive to enjoy over here (milk can push $12 a gallon).