It all
started with breakfast.
There were several times it started
with breakfast, in fact. Breakfast is the meal the that kids
themselves are responsible for cooking before the actual cook comes
along later in the to make lunch and dinner. It has always been this
way and probably always will be because breakfast needs to be started
at dawn in order to get everybody fed before they go off to school.
Usually there had been about five or
six kids that had made breakfast and just took it upon themselves to
get up. I would sometimes if it was particularly cold and I was
usually joined by others looking for warmth from the fire. Some days
nobody would make breakfast and then there would be no porridge to
give out.
However, this last year we went through
a month where nobody ate breakfast. This was not our choice, but
theirs. You see, they just stopped making breakfast. Since they
collectively refused to cook breakfast, they collectively decided to
not eat the food they were not cooking. This was rather upsetting to
us. It was by most accounts an unsettling combination of laziness and
apathy more than a lack of hunger. People still complained of hunger
through the morning and we reminded them the easiest solution is to
just all pitch in and make breakfast.
After a month we finally came down with
an ultimatum. For these kids, them not making breakfast is a huge
offense on several levels. First it is insulting to the people who
donate to the orphanage, both here in Nampula and abroad. How many of
you have told your kids something along the lines of, "Finish
your food, there are starving kids in Africa." Second, it is
insulting because here all we have to say is, "Finish your food,
there are starving kids next door." For our kids to refuse to
cook is a huge offense.
As a result of this ultimatum we
finally decided to make a schedule of people making breakfast. It
works out so that each person has to wake up to boil a pot of water
to make porridge, a task taking all of 30 minutes, approximately once
a month. That is all it takes if everybody pitches in. Once a month.
Boil water.
When we announced the list at a meeting
one evening. It was met by groans and whines, but nothing too
serious. That was until one girl defiantly raised her hand and
announced it would be best to take her of the list because she
refuses to cook. This also is a pretty offensive thing to say here,
and she said it in on offensive manner to boot. We told her that it
meant she would not eat breakfast any of the other morning, a
decision she informed everybody she was perfectly fine with.
This girl, to so rudely and publicly
announce her decision to not participate in the cooking of breakfast,
appeared to be fully prepared to deal with the consequences. It meant
she would be going without breakfast the whole month for her refusal
to cook it once. It was a choice that apparently would not encumber
her that much since she had, after all, been living the last month or
so foregoing breakfast the same as everybody else.
What she was completely unprepared for
was the tidal wave her decision was about to cause. As happens with
with all movements, it really only takes one person to start
something. Two years ago a young Tunisian set himself on fire in
protest of the government and became the catalyst for the Arab Spring
movement. In the south, a young Rosa Parks refused to give up her
seat on a bus, becoming a rallying cry for the civil rights movement
of the 1960's. Five hundred years ago monk named Martin Luther once
defied the Catholic church, spawning protestantism and an entire
religious reformation. Two thousand years ago someone so impacted a
group of twelve followers, who themselves so impacted the world that
human history is divided into the time of before and after his birth.
So when this girl took a stand and
refused to make breakfast (again I stress, only once a month) what
resulted was a wave of vitriol against her so great that is caused
the same change that so many great movements before it had also
affected and caused her to recant. What? You thought there was going
to be a mass wave of other kids refusing to cook breakfast? Of course
not. This post isn't about great and courageous rebellions. This is
about peer pressure.
You see, all it took was one. Not the
one that refused to cook breakfast. The one that decided to call her
out. One person decided to make their voice heard and declared our
young rebel as acting selfish. Then another got the courage to join
in. Yes, and she was inconsiderate too. Others added that she is only
thinking of herself and not of others. Soon after, it had ballooned
in to the whole room rising up against her.
This sounds harsh, but it is. The tough
part is that she didn't decide to revoke her decision immediately and
let it go several days. They next day she got up like everybody else
and went to eat breakfast like everyone else. Unlike everyone else,
she was the subject of leers and jeers and anger directed at her
being there if she so defiantly refused to cook. Again, I didn't say
this was about positive peer pressure.
Peer pressure usually has a negative
connotation, but it can be used for good. Are your friends pressuring
you clean up your life, get a job, pay the rent on time, stop
drinking so much? That's positive peer pressure in my book. Granted,
this isn't always brought about the right way. You can negatively
pressure people into doing good but in a negative way, like with our
reluctant chef. Instead of positively encouraging her to help out and
saying how supportive it would be of her, there was nothing bu hate
directed at her.
As luck would have it, her slot on the
rotation was only three days in. And after three days of literally
everybody refusing to talk to her, she had her chance to redeem
herself. She woke up, cooked breakfast, and everybody forgave her and
all was set right in the world.
This story fortunately has a good
ending, but peer pressure is rife here every bit as it is is America.
And often it has really negative outcomes. Cliffhanger!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment