In Which TJ Shops Till He Drops

I have a favorite pair of shorts. They’re just simple gym shorts good for most occasions. I can use them while I’m doing some serious sporting, I can throw them on for while I’m just lounging around, I can (and have) worn them to church. They also have pockets (woohoo!) so they’re good for carrying around keys or pencils or oranges or some spare change. 

The most important thing that makes these my favorite shorts is that they just feel so unbelievable comfortable. There’s something about them that fit so good and the texture to them is just a little bit different then regular shorts. They’re not the same type of weave that I’ve in my other shorts. The mesh and the cut are just a little bit different. They’re such nice shorts that I even remember buying them at the Nike Outlet store just outside of Seaside, Oregon when I was still in high school.

I'm really not sure what I'm supposed to do with my hands.
 

Here’s a picture of me in my favorite shorts. They’re plain, simple, unappealing. They are currently being paired with the only ironic t-shirt I own (it reads “the Supes are back”), which itself is ironic because I don’t like ironic t-shirts and this t-shirt was not always ironic. The t-shirt is also complemented by a week of stubble, which I grew because everybody (read: my mom) asks to see more pictures of me to see how I’m doing and the beard helps disguise just how weight I’ve dropped. Several bouts with malaria and a blood infection are way more effective at shedding pounds than jazzercising.

(This current paragraph was originally unintended as I outlined this post, but I decided to use it to point out that jazzercise is recognized as an official word by the spellchecker.)

Perhaps the only thing frustrating about these shorts is that I’ve never been able find another pair like them. I haven’t even been able to find the same pair to start a stockpile for that unenviable day when these shorts will see their end, be it a ripped crotch, lost in luggage, eaten by rats (slightly common here) or just plain wearing threadbare. I have searched high and low online and offline for shorts that have the same distinct qualities as my shorts, and I just haven’t been able to.

Upcoming Site Maintenance

This weekend I'm going to be doing a little work on the site. Nothing major, just a few little minor tweaks. Hopefully look for it to come back up Monday or Tuesday. So if between now and the front of next week if you try to get on the the site and it doesn't work it's because I took it down to work on it for a little bit.

I don't know of a way to have it redirect to one of those "Site down for maintenance" announcements, so this is gonna have to do. Hopefully the repairs go well and its not down for more than a few hours, but this is the interweb, so anything could happen...

In Which TJ Gets a Little Homesick

My life here is about Mozambique. Well, its also about Jesus, and that's the only reason I'm here. Its why I came to Mozambique, its why I live in Mozambique. Its very plain to me every day that I definitely don't live in America. And yet, there are many things that I consider to be part of my identity that got left behind when I came here. I'm not talking about getting rid of my sense of humor or love of random trivia or infatuation with Carrie Underwood. I'm talking about the things that I enjoy that I no longer have the opportunity to do.

The more I think about it--the things that I really miss--the more I discover that it really revolves around three things: family, sports, and the intersection of the two. Its hard because I really miss these things, and it can be easy for them to turn into idols. Its easy to lose track of time and sit in front of facebook for hours trying to figure what my friends are all doing. Its also a pretty narcissistic exercise, so I try to avoid it when I can, but there's just certain times that I can't help but miss things. Things like:

...my family. I miss them a lot. All of them. Especially bbqs and birthday parties.

In Which TJ Builds His Vocabulary

As I think I've mentioned before, there are several words that have crept into the vocabulary here that are almost beyond comprehension. Part of it is a result of globalism and the wide reach of English-spoken pop culture. One example of this was the car I saw this week that had "100% Lil Wayne" detailed on the side. Never mind that somebody just wrote a completely incomprehensible phrase on their mid 90's Honda Civic, all people see are Lil Wayne as probably the third most famous American next to Obama and Justin Beeber. And one of those isn't even American. And depending on who you talk to, the other isn't either.

There are many more examples of where the English language has been masterfully butchered, but unfortunately for some reason all the examples I have are horribly inappropriate for a site that my mother reads (not to mention my grandmothers). So perhaps I'll save those stories for some time when I'm really sad and dejected and just don't care about these updates anymore.

In Which the Boys Go Barnstorming

School has made it to the end of the second term here and so we’re on a bit of a break. While I assume most kids back in the states are eating sno-cones and riding their bikes to the park everyday for their summer break, the boys at the orphanage have taken a much more capitalist approach to their two-week term break.How so? Lemonade stand? Lawn mowing? Goat herding? No, no, and mostly no. We’ve been playing soccer!

How does playing soccer earn you money? It’s very simple. So simple in fact that if word gets out it could revolutionize professional sports. I’ll explain.

Say you have a baseball team, or basketball, or football team. Let’s exclude the fringe sports like roller derby or boxing for a second. It’ll soon become clear. What if instead of paying your players whether they win or lose with guaranteed contracts, you only pay them if they win and do a good job. This makes sense in real businesses, so why not sports. If I have an airplane company and the people building the airplanes haven’t quite figured out the whole “flying” thing they are soon going to be out of a job when nobody buys my defective product. Or let’s say you have a restaurant where the food is really good and the line is out the door. The chefs are gonna keep their jobs and you’ll need to hire more waiters.